It’s Camp NaNoWriMo right now, which means that I am deep,
deep into writing a new first draft. I mentioned in my bonus vlog on Mondaythat one of the things I’ve been struggling with the most so far this month is
switching my brain from ninth draft mode, where things are partially polished
and fairly sound structurally, to a messy, rough, plot hole ridden first draft.
Now, don’t get me wrong, first drafting is absolutely still my favourite part
of the writing process. But at the same time, it has been sparking quite a few
thoughts about comparisons.
Have you ever read a book that blew you away with just how
good it was, and then looked at your own novel only to be discouraged by how
bad it is? Or read something from one of your writing friends, and then
shuffled your novel under a pile of papers so no one could see the mess that
you’re working on? Have you ever read your own writing and cringed at how bad
it seems? I don’t know about you, but this is something I feel often.
Why does our work always compare so unfavourably to everyone
else’s?
I think the first issue is familiarity. We’ve been looking
at our own writing for so long, staring at it, searching out flaws, looking for
problems on purpose, especially when we’re editing, until we almost hate even looking
at the words. Your brain is programmed to look for the problems, the
inconsistencies, the holes. We can’t see the good parts because, consciously or
not, we’re searching for the things that wrong with our writing. It’s why we
need to take time away between drafts, so that we can come back and see our own
writing with eyes that are fresh and can see the good parts as well as the bad.
Another factor is where your book is in its writing journey.
This might be your first draft, but what your writer friend is sharing could be
in its fifth. Or they’ve just selected the best moments from their novels to
share, revising them many times to make sure that they’re only presenting good
moments. No one wants to show their novel in a bad light. It’s like watching a
highlight reel of their novels, while you’re still slogging through the hours
of hard work in your own. Or you’re comparing the novel you’re editing to a
book that has had literally years of work put into it and dozens of eyes working
on making it better. How is it fair to you, or your book to compare your first
draft to someone else’s final product?
And finally, every writer is different. I personally love
books with beautiful description, lyrical writing that leaps off the page in
brightly coloured images, deep messages and uplifting, meandering plotlines. These
aren’t the books that I write. And when I compare my books to these, mine appear
unfavourably. Because it’s not fair to compare two different styles. How can
you compare apples with oranges, or sparsely described, action filled novels
with slower paced, musical tales wandering through thoughts and themes? Your
book is beautiful, just in a different way.
My first draft compares terribly to my ninth draft. My ninth
draft compares badly to many of the books that I love to read. And that’s ok.
Because my first draft is only in the beginning stages. My ninth draft is
written completely differently to the books I love. And I’ve been working on
them both so much I can’t see where they are. Sometimes we just need to a step
back and see just how good our writing can actually be.
