Snazzy Snippets: Romance Edition
19:42
We hit a little snag
in editing this week. And by snag I mean a massive plot hole the size of the Marianas
Trench, which has me weeping in a dark corner at the amount of rewriting it’s
going to take to fix it. Consider I just hit 55k before discerning the problem,
which requires me to go back and fix over half the book, the amount of despairing
tears being wept could fill said plot hole twice over. Now if only that was a
viable solution.
So, instead of
discussing my abysmal writing week, I’m going to cheer myself up immensely by
linking up with Snazzy Snippets,
hosted by Alyssa@The Devil Orders Takeout and Emily@Loony Literate, and share
some excerpts. These come from my current project, Snow, and involve the two MCs, Eric and Nicola. Valentine’s Day
might have come and gone, but there’s always time for some fuzzy feels.
A Heartwarming Snippet That Makes Readers Go “Aww!”
Yes, I know, another
excerpt from the infamous cookie scene. I think I’ve used it in about three
different posts now. But it is by far the most heartwarming of any of my scenes
so far, so I’m sharing this anyway.
Eric
plucked a morsel up in his thumb and forefinger and popped it in his mouth.
Instantly it exploded with flavour. There were cookies, and then there were
mouthwateringly amazing delicacies. These weren’t even cooked yet, but he was
already sure this was a success. His mouth watered, begging for a second taste.
“These are amazing.”
“I agree. These have turned out pretty good.
I think we can count this recipe as a success.” Nicola nodded her head in a
considering fashion. “They’ll go down nicely I think.”
“Where did you learn to cook like this?” Eric
asked. How did anyone learn to cook like this? This was practically
professional quality.
“My mum taught me.” An uncharacteristically
sad expression flitted over Nicola’s face. She turned away and started fussing
with the trays. “If you think my cookies are good, you should taste hers.”
Instinctively, Eric knew he had touched on a
sensitive subject for Nicola. An unexpected feeling of understanding touched
him, and he avoided pressing her on the subject, instead trying to lighten the
mood with a silly story of his own. If anyone understood sadness over a mother,
it was him. “My mum gave up trying to teach me to cook after I burned water and
set the oven gloves on fire.” He managed a half smile through his own sudden
stab of sadness at the memory. “She wouldn’t let me in the kitchen for anything
after that. I’m honestly surprised I haven’t set anything on fire in here yet.”
“You simply can’t learn to cook without
making a few mistakes and quite a lot of mess.” Nicola gestured to the kitchen
bench, which was now liberally coated with sugar and flour, and to the floor
which was even worse. “This is what a kitchen should look like after you’ve
finished working in it. Now, shall we get these cookies rolled and in the
oven?” She smiled, but there was still a touch of sadness in her eyes. There was
a story behind Nicola’s family. Eric couldn’t help but wonder what happened.
But then, he could hardly press her for information. Not when he was so
desperately trying to hide his own past.
A Kissing Snippet
Sorry folks. This
isn’t a kissing book. However, I hate to leave a blank section, so instead I
present to you one of my favourite snippets.
Eric caught the intense focus in Andrews’
eyes a second too late. “Watch out,” he gasped, his voice little more than a
strangled croak.
It was too late. Andrews swept his hand
through the air, pushing a huge gust of wind into Nicola. She flew sideways.
Her head crashed into the side of the wardrobe. Then she slid to the ground and
lay still. Even as she collapsed, Andrews turned and leapt out the window, a
rush of air carrying him away from the building before anyone could stop him.
The other agents were there in the doorway,
guns in hand, surveying the situation only seconds after everything played out.
Eric looked from them to Nicola, still crumpled on the floor, gun clutched
tightly in her hand. Greg’s face was tight as he put up his gun. There was no
need to explain what happened here. The red haired Sara dropped to her knees
beside her friend, while Greg strode to the window. He pulled a small dart out
of the wall. Nicola did get a shot off then, right before Andrews hit her.
Sara shook Nicola’s shoulder. “Nicola. Are
you ok? Nicola. Can you hear me?”
Blood trickled down the side of Nicola’s face
and her face was pale. But, even as Eric watched, her eyes fluttered open. “Not
so loud,” she mumbled. “My head kills.”
Sara let out a shaky laugh. “It should do.
You just demolished a wardrobe with it.”
“Maybe I shouldn’t turn this into a habit,”
Nicola said.
A Snippet Where Love Interests First Appear Together
Not quite the heartwarming first meeting, but a pretty
accurate description of the ups and downs of their relationship.
As they headed down
the hallway in the direction of the kitchen, they unexpectedly met Bethany
stepping out of the lift with an unfamiliar boy by her side. He was about the
same age as them with dark hair and a serious, closed off expression. Nicola
eyed him with much curiosity. Well, that was different. She jerked her head in
their direction, muttering to Sara, “Megan’s guy from last night?”
“Could be.” Sara
flashed a smile at the newcomer. “Hi. You must be new here. I’m Sara.” She
stuck out a hand for him to shake.
“Eric.” He didn’t take
her hand, just watched her with eyes that held buckets of suspicion.
Sara’s smile faltered
and she dropped her hand. Then her smile fixed back into place, though a little
less bright than before. “Bethany helping you settle in?”
“Yeah.”
“Cool.” Sara’s voice
trailed away, like she didn’t know what to make of this guy.
Well, Nicola knew what
to make of them. Either he was feeling intensely awkward, or he was just a
stuck up little so-and-so. Either way he was extremely rude. She folded her
arms and lifted her chin, watching him with growing coolness. “Not a big
talker, hey?” she said. “Or does it hurt you to say more than one word at a
time?”
He turned that frigid
gaze on her. Nicola pressed her lips together and held his eye. Not
intimidating at all. What was it Megan said? Bethany could take him down if he
got violent? Not a challenge at all. Something spiralled through the air and
landed on her skin. A snowflake? In the middle of summer inside? The
temperature was dropping noticeably now, and Nicola was willing it bet it wasn’t
because they’d upgraded the air conditioning. Which meant this guy had to be
doing it.
Bethany must have come
to the same conclusion, because she touched him gently on the arm. “I’ll take
you to the kitchen now. It’s this way.”
She must have been
using her calming aura on him again, because he followed her without protest,
though he kept his eyes firmly fixed on Nicola until he’d passed her
completely. For her past, Nicola glared at his retreating back until he had
completely vanished round the corner. Only then did she relax a little, though
she couldn’t quite let go of her annoyance yet.
“Well.” She said
finally. And that word pretty much said it all.
And that’s it folk. My slightly less than romantic Snazzy
Snippets post. Phew, that ended up a bit long! Are you joining in this month? Link me to your post in the
comments? Which excerpt was your favourite? Is there any kissing in your book?
And tell me, do you have a scene that you share over and over again?
10 comments
I LOVE ALL THESE! If this were a published book, I would read the heck out of it. I love how well-developed your characters are, and the dialogue and thought processes of each character is super believable.
ReplyDeleteEllie | On the Other Side of Reality
Thank you so much Ellie! I'm so, so glad to hear you liked them. I've actually been feeling really down about my book recently, so your comment has really brightened my day!
DeleteThe cookie scene is the best!! And the second scene is super tense, and I'm already interested in seeing how their relationship changes in the book. Love your dialogue, it flows so well!
ReplyDeleteThank you for linking up with us, Imogen :)
Really? Thanks! I always struggle with dialogue, so I'm so glad to hear it flows well in these excerpts. Thank you for hosting this link-up. Two months in a row is a real treat!
DeleteOoh, I really liked these. Especially the first one. I mean, I know it's heartwarming and wonderful and all, but it's also seriously making me crave cookies. Like, really badly. But that is a very good thing. *nods*
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for sharing these snippets! I really enjoyed reading them! :)
Haha, I hope you had cookies on hand. I promise to not post any more cookie scenes so you won't be too hungry! Thank you for taking the time to read my little snippets. I'm always so glad when people enjoy them.
DeleteAh, cookies make everything better! I think that one was especially nice. :) I think all of them demonstrate a very exciting plot, though... WHAT IS HAPPENING?
ReplyDeleteThey do indeed. I love my cookie scene dearly, though I think I've spammed people with it enough by this point! I'm glad you liked it though. Haha, they don't really give much idea of the plot exactly, I will say. Thanks for stopping by, Heather!
Delete*chants* shipshipshIP. These are so adorable. <3
ReplyDeleteAw, I'm glad you like them. They're so much fun to write!
Delete